Unlike your BFFs, cousins or gay caballeros –
who will either sing what you want to hear,
or deride your sanity-challenged choices
behind your back – I'll pluck it straight without
real-life repercussion. No, I haven't experienced
it all. I am, however, well educated. And my white
horse is a compelling shade of gray—unless you
sicken me or victimize others, gawddamned pervs.
I hope you guys get ass-cancer and die.

As for us "normal" people, we can all use an
unbiased sounding board, yes? Plus I (and my
half-dozen voyeuristic readers) get some train-
wreck joy at your expense. See? Everybody's
happy. So. Fess up any necessary background
info along with your query and sound-off to
complete strangers. Let's solve some probs!

Or, er, worsen them considerably. I mean, I
am an affirmed hypocrite, after all. But
you know what they say: Every time God
shuts a door, He tries not to let it
hit you in the ass.

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